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When Darren fell in love with Jeany, from the Philippines, they pictured a beautiful life together in Australia. But their dream has been put on hold. It was November when Jeany and I first made contact through the online romance site – Filipino Cupid. She was looking to meet someone outside of her own country and culture and so was I. Connecting with someone from overseas also seemed like a bit of adventure to me as well. We chatted for a few days through the website, then moved onto Skype chats, and it was through talking on Skype, being able to see each other, that things really started to progress in a good way.
In September , Leonor Cabigon, a year-old Filipina mother of two, returned early from a trip to find a young woman sleeping in the bed she shared with her American husband Dan in Valencia, a remote mountain town in the Philippine island province of Negros Oriental. Divorce is illegal and socially taboo in the Philippines, but Leonor realized she would have to leave her husband.
She had followed a well-worn script when she and Dan met in beautiful young Filipina meets old but rich Western man. That dynamic was just beginning to change in , when Leonor became one of the first Filipina women to meet a Western partner online. For the next 15 years, Dan provided her with a more comfortable life than she could have expected, but one where her own needs always took second place. When she decided to try online dating again, a month after she and Dan separated, Leonor was determined to make a wiser choice.
Unlike in , when she and Dan exchanged emails and scanned pictures over a slow connection, Leonor had a robust set of online tools — video chat, social media, messaging apps — to help her find the right man. She registered on FilipinoCupid. Unlike the first time, when she got together with the first viable man who came along, she vetted the men she met through their Facebook accounts, chatted with them on Viber and WhatsApp, and then eventually got on Skype with the ones she felt most serious about.
But a power dynamic that for decades favored Western men has steadily tipped toward Filipina women, largely because of technologies that level the information gap that used to separate the two parties. Yet even as Filipinas and Westerners face off as equals online, the world of dating exposes the ultimate limitations of the web. Virtual connections must eventually be realized in physical space, where real-world politics, money, and bodies intervene.
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Earvin Charles Cabalquinto – 08 Mar, Finding a romantic partner happens right at our fingertips. The proliferation of matchmaking websites and applications has revolutionised how intimate interracial relationships can be forged in a fast-paced and creative way. However, such personalised and digital practices are not detached from the broader politics of gendered mobility, identity, and intimacy.
Even before the rise of dating applications, Filipinas had already used matchmaking channels to meet and eventually marry a foreign national. Historically, interracial marriages had been linked to the phenomenon of mail-order brides.
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